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Justin & Becca

Currently enjoying our new baby, Angelo

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Lessons Learned

1. Buy bug spray as soon as your plane touches Australian soil, don’t wait you will forget and regret.

2. If any other travelers say it’s good, it sucks. If they say it’s bad, it’s great!

3. Even if the gas station sign says it’s ok, the gas station attendants say it’s ok, other travelers say it’s ok, Aussies say it’s ok, and especially if the government says it’s ok: DO NOT USE OPAL FUEL ! You will be the proud owner of a new fuel filter, fuel pump, and spark plugs for sure.

4. Ayers Rock is like “Disneyland” but without the Disney…..it’s just land.

5. McDonald’s has now earned the title of McEmbassy, it’s way better down here.

6. Everything is always on SALE, 60% off the 200% mark ups!

7. Must never open any doors or windows on your campervan. To enter/exit you must metamorphosis through the key hole so as not to let bugs set up shop inside.

8. Where is Wal-Mart? :(

9. Be sure to play the “Count the Roos” game when you’re on the highways, the dead ones that is. Hours of numerical entertainment!

10. Why did the chicken cross the road? To show the Kangaroo that it’s possible.

11. Bring your copy of Crocodile Dundee. They don’t have it at the historic site where the movie was made.

12. If you’re looking at a 10 year old map and think the road might be paved by now, it’s not.

13. If your name is Justin, GROW THAT FRO!

14. See the Reef!  See the Reef!  See the Reef!

15. Be sure to wave at passing travelers on Outback roads, could be hours till you see the next car.


17. Don’t feel bad for sharks or crocs, they suck!

18. Kill the “Greenies”, they’re over populated!

19. We think there are 3 cops in the Outback but we only saw two.

20. “Aussies Beer Blows!”- Justin Andrews

21. Doesn’t matter of the sand is white or red, it’s gonna trash your camera.

22. American girls play with Barbie Dolls. Aussie girls play with kangaroo bones.

Boing! Boing! Boing!

23. American flies like rotten food and poo. Aussie flies like YOU!

24. Leopard stingrays are beautiful, exotic, and DELLICOUS!

25. Toyota Landcruiser: BEST CAR EVER MADE!

26. Avoid Darwin in the summer….you wont regret it….we didn’t.

27. Do you ever wonder where the 80’s are calling from when they want their clothes back? I’ll give you a hint….it starts with “A” and rhymes with Foostralia.

28. Boxed wine is called Goon.

29. Slap the Goon! Slap it like you mean it because anything named Goon deserves to be slapped.

Slappy Slappy

30. The Outback: Nevada….with TREES!

31. You might be a redneck if the Outback looks like home.

32. The people in South Australia, especially Paul & Skender in Whyalla, are the best Ambassadors of true Australian hospitality that we have experienced. 

  • Amendment #1 to Rule 32:  Add George and Stan in Baird Bay to the list.

33. Don’t tell Tourists about Whyalla.  Free Camping, free running water, free electricity,  free hot showers and free seafood dinners right out of the ocean.

34. Cage Diving: it enloves a 2 hour boat ride, a small aluminum cage that sits just under the surface, buckets of bloody fish heads, HUGE Great White Sharks, and WAY WAY WAY too much money.

35. Do not watch “Wolf Creek” if you plan to go campervaning in Australia…actually, maybe you should…or not…doh!

36.  Swim up, down, around, backward, flip, spin, blow bubbles and just PLAY with the dolphins and sea lions if you want to earn their trust.

37. Apparently, Streaking at Streaky Bay is frowned upon.

38. Make sure not to miss Point Avoid…(Ironic, huh?)

39. Just because a fishing spot with a catchy name like “Salmon Hole”,  “Shark Alley”, or “Snapper Point” does not mean that you will catch anything.

40. Flies still suck.

41.  Don’t freak out if you see a HUGE spider on your Husband’s leg, just swat it…he feels emasculated when he dances like that.

42. Why did revolving restaurants go out of style in America? 

43.  The Craft Beer industry in OZ is where America was in the Early 90’s, if anyone is looking to be a front runner in this “about to explode” market, let me know.

1 Comment »

1 Comment » to “Lessons Learned”

  1. mom Says:

    Ya know that rock band guy you met awhile back? Have you thought about giving him the “lessons learne” it would be funny in a song.. no joke!!
    I know you guys had fun writing it!! don’t you think the people who sold you the opal gas had a direct line to the people who towed you to the mechanic. Why else would mechanic have 2 vacation homes.. You have tourist written all over you.. try and not talk next time and see if the they treat you with some home talk.

    I wonder what more you will be adding as your months continue to evolve in Australia!!

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